Joyce Chua (CG-James Tan, PJS1)

I used to think it was enough to believe and have faith in God. I thought being a Christian is just that simple. Ignorant you may say, but that’s what I knew then. Later on, I encountered a few Christians who questioned my credibility as a Christian by asking if I regularly attend church, cell groups, get baptised, etc. Therefore, after I finally found a church where I was comfortable, I regularly attended the church’s celebration. I even committed myself to join a cell group. Finally, I decided I should be baptised to remove all suspicions and accusation that I am not a true Christian. Hence, I signed up for BMEW weekend.

During this weekend, I realised it is just not this act of baptising that makes me a true Christian but, the need to make a decision and act upon in. To quote Pastor Chris, "It’s about turning 180 degrees."

It is about willing to change my ways to God’s ways. It’s about being accountable to each other through participation in cell groups, church and ministry. It is about having one-to-one time with the Lord. It is about submitting to God’s authority, reading His Words, praying consistently and many more. It is about being in tune to God.

Only then, I can walk confidently with God beside of me all the time; giving me wisdom and advice, as no one else can do it. In doubt, He’ll speak to me to make wise decisions. I now know, this will happen if I learn to speak more and devote more personal time to God. For when we speak to Him, He’ll give us the answers we seek.

I never realized, truly how much God loves us. I knew He sacrificed His son, Jesus Christ for our sins; but I did not fully comprehend the depth of His love until Pastor Chris illustrated Luke 15:11-24 as the parable of the waiting father. He reminded us how much our heavenly Father loves us, as long as we are willing to take that one step towards Him. Only then, God will run the remaining steps to us. This stirred a realisation within me that the empty voids in my heart that I long to fill cannot be filled by mere man. Finding a friend, confidant and partner in mere mortal man cannot remove the loneliness in my heart. Those voids only belong to Christ. My heart belongs to Him. Now, I realized I can remove my loneliness by receiving Christ fully into my heart. I know He can complete my heart.

Initially, I felt a little fear and reluctance to go to the Encounter Weekend. I felt as if I am not good enough to be a true Christian because I have not faithfully devoted my time to Christ. I felt alone and fearful. Instead, this weekend surprised me as it passed quickly. It was a time of learning and understanding. Each session was unexpectedly enjoyable and I felt great. In fact, I managed to bond with two fellow Christians who were encouraging and supportive of me. I am very thankful God prompted me to finally attend BMEW after so long. I personally feel anyone who attends this weekend will benefit so much that he or she will wonder why they never did this earlier in the first place. It was a relaxing, comforting and ministering time for me as I got to learn to take that one step towards God and tell Him, "Here I am, Lord, I need You. I love You, Lord. Please love me too." I felt as if God really ran towards me and gave me a big comforting hug; whispering, "Child, I have always loved you".

Thank you, Pastor Chris for this spiritual awakening weekend for me.